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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24229414">Alone.</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/neoResistance/pseuds/neoResistance'>neoResistance</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/F, Fem!Reddie, Implied/Referenced Suicide, LESBIANS!!!!!!, Reddie, Richie Tozier Has a Dog, gender bend, gender swap, his name is ryu lol, this is for my gf</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 18:35:54</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,242</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24229414</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/neoResistance/pseuds/neoResistance</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Rachel Tozier lost the love of her life. Would she be able to lose her again?</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Eddie Kaspbrak &amp; Richie Tozier, Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>12</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Alone.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The scenario played out in her mind once more, tossing and turning in the sweat-soaked sheets until Rachel was forced to awaken, looking down at the shirt that was gripped so hard her knuckles were turning white. Thundercats… She sighed out before getting up, lighting a cigarette as she made her way back out to the balcony. It had only been about a week and a half. Rachel’s apartment was an absolute mess. Clothes on the floor, dishes piling in the sink, garbage cluttered her house. Edith would’ve killed her if she saw. Edith…<br/>
The raven haired woman ashed her cigarette over the edge of her third story apartment balcony as she pushed the name back where it came from. She sighed out as she saw her dog, Ryu, sit next to her.<br/>
Ever since it happened, Rachel felt the guilt eating away at her. She hadn’t showered since before they all jumped into the quarry, her appearance resembling that of a matted dog in need of a good brush. Her curls were tangled into knots. The knots had knots, and so forth. She didn’t dare to change out of her sweatpants and a shirt she stole from Edith when they were younger. Of course Eds always had a larger chest than her so by now it fit her perfectly, despite her lanky build. The fabric hugged her skin perfectly as if it were made just for her.<br/>
Just as she was finishing up the cigarette, she heard her TV go out and on once more.<br/>
“Piece of shit.” Rachel grumbled to herself before simply flicking the cigarette into the freshly green grass. She turned, closing the sliding door behind her as both members of the household were inside, making her way to the TV to smack the side of it. Though her usual full proof plan didn’t work, the flickering continued.<br/>
“Are you fucking kidding me? Come on!” The lanky girl was at her wits end with just about anything and everything that was being thrown her way. After a couple more smacks, the TV went back to normal, yet right after Rachel’s dog was the one to act up now. He barked at a corner in the room, making Rachel raise her eyebrow.<br/>
“What is it, Yu..?” She slowly walked over, attempting to pull the dog away just to get bitten at.<br/>
“Motherfucker!” She yelped, pulling away to apply some pressure to the newfound wound on her wrist and hand.<br/>
“Go! Get in your bed!” She yelled, pointing at a black metal crate covered in pillows and blankets. The dog growled once more before making his way obediently to the cage, laying down with a grumble. Then something touched her.<br/>
With a squeal, she went tumbling down, tripping over her own feet before her body hit the ground. What the fuck was going on?<br/>
“R...ch...l” A voice rang out through the empty apartment, as well as the woman’s ears. This couldn’t be real.<br/>
“Hello?” She pleaded out, her legs trembled too much for her to get up. She wasn’t religious yet found herself praying to something...someone up there that it wasn’t It.<br/>
“Rachel, don’t be afraid...it’s me..” A figure had appeared in front of her. A blue glow around the figure as well as the features. It couldn’t be..<br/>
“Edith..! Edith..” She exclaimed once she figured out who it had been, “oh is it really you!” Her smile got wider as she stood up, hugging her close just to have her arms wrapped back around her. Right. You couldn’t hug a ghost could you..?<br/>
“Rachel...I’m so sorry..” The ghost had been cut off before she could finish by the loudmouth herself.<br/>
“No I’m sorry...I wanted to save you, I really did...I feel so terrible it eats away at my soul more and more every day..” She confessed, gripping her shirt as she did so.<br/>
After a bit of talking, explaining, and some crying on Rachel’s end that night, the two spent their days together. Being lovers once more.. But one day, things were a little off..they had grown so close but Edith had been acting a little distant lately. Just as she was pondering this topic, the ghost herself wandered towards her bed, “Rachel..” Edith started off quietly, getting the others attention.<br/>
“What is it, Eds..?” She sat up from her bed, closing the comic book she had been reading beforehand. Her heart dropped when she heard the next words.<br/>
“I think it’s time I pass on..”<br/>
“What? Edith you just got here- I...I just got you back-“ The taller female stuttered out, feeling the tears well up, “I can’t lose you again, please-!” She was pleading, gripping the fabric of her own shirt desperately, just to feel something in that moment.<br/>
“I can’t keep staying like this...I can’t feel anything<br/>
, and I’d slowly fade away either way..” She admitted hesitantly, grabbing at her lover’s panicked hand before continuing, “I want you to be happy...without me..”<br/>
“I could never-“<br/>
“You can. I’m moving on..and..” Edith paused, pulling away, “we’re breaking up.” If she had a heart, it’d be beating loud enough to fill the empty room that had engulfed the two in silence.<br/>
Rachel felt her face getting hot, the heat moving throughout her entire body as if she were made of magma. She tried to form words yet nothing came out, her mouth hung agape as she stared at the figure in front of her. Once she could finally speak, she said the first thing to come to her mind. Big mistake.<br/>
“I never want to see you again.” Her words were sharp like daggers, as cold as the metal that lay in the handle of one. Tears streamed out of her eyes as she got up, getting ready to go out, “Dont follow me.” She sneered, slamming the door behind her. It was just a silly fight. She thought to herself, getting some air to help calm her down. Things will be fine when I get home.</p><p>     Rachel gripped the steering wheel as she glared at her apartment, sighing out before making her way out of the car and into the home. On her table was a note.</p><p>     Rachel Tozier,<br/>
I wish you the best on your journey. And I hope you’ll get over this and not be mad at me anymore. I’ll see you in the future. Until then, I love you a lot. Find a way to make yourself happy again.<br/>
— Edith Kaspbrak.</p><p>     Rachel felt her legs collapse under her, falling to the wooden floor as her chest heaved and rested. Tears fell endlessly as she let a wail out to fill the silence in the room. Her sobs battled with the ability to breathe, gasping for air as she slammed her fists on the solid wood beneath her. It felt like her whole world was falling apart. And it was. Her true love had been ripped from her not only once, but twice. It felt as if all the feelings of that day were ganging up on her. She barely survived it then, it felt like a personal hell now.<br/>
That night, Rachel Tozier didn’t climb into bed. She didn’t brush her teeth and watch her favorite show. She didn’t pet her dog goodnight or throw the ball for him like she always did. Rachel Tozier didn’t survive that night.<br/>
Four losers left.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>i made this for my gf!!! i hope she’s not crying right now i’m sorry if you are my love!<br/>also i forget ao3 has a formatting thing let’s hope it works</p></blockquote></div></div>
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